why?

had a great dinner with a long lost friend earlier, didnt see her for almost 6yrs....well you know, priorities! things that we need to put our best efforts first before other things... that's why it took us 6yrs just to share a simple dinner.

my friend is now happily married to a very handsome Greek guy with two beautiful kids, i used to jokingly tell her "o meron ka ng sarili mong greek god" (when they were still bf-gf's)..

earlier during dinner i asked her "so kamusta ang greek god mu?" she replied with a big smile "haaayy super bait, parang masyado akong blessed with him"...and i can tell that by the way her eyes twinkled everytime she has to mention his name, she's still inlove with the same guy after all these years.

she told me "hindi kame nagaaway, puro petty tampuhan lang, pero minsan nabobored akong kasama sya, parang nakakasawa na"... i told her "well maybe lahat naman ng mag-asawa dumadaan sa ganyan, normal lang siguro"... then she said after a long pause "eh kaw musta ang lovelife?", and all i could answer was a smile.

"so wala parin after ni P?"... i "said wala na, yoko na"

that question made me wrote this post.. with a question in mind "bakit nga ba wala pa ulit" well here are some of the reasons that i could think of:


- maybe because nadala na ako, the last time i fell in love lead me into believing that a gay relationship is forever.. MALI!

- i always compare guys that ive met to my ex-boyfriend...dapat ganito sya, dapat ganito ugali nya and so on and so forth, maybe because iam afraid to see my ex one day and then may maiipipintas sya sa kasama ko... pero walang perfect guy diba??!

- im too hopeless romantic... lahat nalang kase ng mabasa kong books at mapanood kong movie sa dvd e feeling ko mangyayari din saken.. Gising! hindi ako si Bella!

- im too scared to let my cards down... maybe that's why, hindi ako masyadong totoo sa sarili ko...kaya pati sa nakakarelasyon ko, hindi ako totoo.

- or baka naman kase ayoko na talaga, mas gusto ko nalang siguro sumuko kesa magTry.. i think that's the easiest kase!


well, whatever the reason maybe, the thing is, as of now im really happy. i can do whatever i want, i can shop all i want, i can go drinking till the wee-hours of the morning..i have my family and friends around, what more could i ask for?!

i realized, hindi din naman sa lahat ng pagkakataon na ang taong inlove ay laging happy, at hindi din naman sa lahat ng sandali na ang taong nagiisa at walang karelasyon kagaya ko e laging malungkot.

'Weather weather lang yan' as people say... ill have my right time. but right now ill enjoy my life to the fullest =)